Me and the real world.... My LIFE.

While writing a scrap to padi, the thought arose... when I told he could indeed do a MBA after his MS.... sometime in his life, should he feel the need to do so.
And he said, like many others do, either flippantly or seriously
"More studies? No way, man... "
And I thought... How has the last 6 months of my life been? With respect to the 2 years I spent @ MT atleast... What has been different? The positives? The losses?
Hmmm......

Being back in college has allowed me one thing: To focus ( on the rare occassions that I actually do!) on a single task. 1st term the mantra was very simple - MUG ur way thru... It didnt last too long though, we ppl soon figured out that it wasnt exactly required to mug all the time to get thru with faitly decent grades :)
Second term was a bit painful that way - you had to (supposedly) divide ur time between preparing for summers, and academics. And even academics involved a lot of group work... and thats one thing I found very painful. Being a relatively early sleeper, and one who prefers to work in the morning, I would stumble thru the (invariably) 11Pm - 1 AM grp meetings half asleep...
( The grp eventually found a way out to accomodate my errant sleep pattern - they would leave behind my part of the work for me to do the next morning ( i.e. I would have to mostly collate data and frame the report/ppt) or on rare occassions we would meet at an earlier hour. )

Work.... Now thats a good one. Did I really do any work @ MT? I dont think so.... Not as much as I could have, at any rate. Sure there were phases when I've slogged my ass off... But going by other batchmates' experiences, hardly much. Any regrets? Not at this point of time, I guess. I dont think I learnt too much from those 2 years at all.... Not as much as others possibly miht have ( I dont c why else B-schools would consider Work-ex such an important aspect!) I had a jolly good time @ MT - working when absolutely neccessary.
However, I do remember that I was hardly a great person to be with at home... In a foul mood so often ( why? why ??? CAT?) that I almost ended up alienating those closest to me - my family. Thats no longer in my life... It took sometime to get over that phase of my life. Thanks to chithi, who has this uncanny knack somehow of putting things in perspective in a very simple manner. 'Have a frown on ur face all the time and u'll end up looking like that forever'. Not a great statement? Dunno, It sure worked with me.
Took me a while to realise that I had to stop getting worked up so easily... And to be able to smile more... Some very forgettable incidents in that period ( which since I am saying are very 'forgettable' are obviously those that are etched in my mind.)
And I still dont know WHY was it that i was in such a state....

( This is turning out to be a real ramble, thats what u get when u decide to sit down and think for a while about ur life.... Introspection AND retrospection. I just told a friend a couple of days back, who planned to do the same, that it would be a meaningless exercise. Ara's Hypocrisy at its best... :| )

Call it misplaced ( I dont think it is, at this point of time atleast ) ego or whatever.... I finally feel like I belong. To what, u may ask? Well, life's been a struggle for quite a while.... Not a painful one - my engg and MT work-ex could hardly be called that. But the desire to find out where I stood... How good I was....
And IS CAT the answer to that question? Hardly. I know that for sure. BUT, it still gave me the opportunity to interact with people of high intellectual capability. Basically, to be amongst some of the best minds in India.

And one MAJOR loss , in a way... I dont EARN anymore. Not really an issue though. Had salted away a fair bit during those 2 yeards @ MT... And though I'm no ascetic, my wants are few. I mean how many Rs. worth biscuits CAN one eat over 2 years :D
Summers might replenish some moolah thats been disappearing from my bank a/c though...
I guess the real issue is not money... It never has been at home. Its about not earning.

Have I covered all that I wanted to think about when I set about writing this post...? I dunno. In any case I'm done writing about this topic ( Btw, I'm typing this after typing the P.S. and P.P.S. sections below :|) So much for coherent thought.

P.S. Up ahead are going to be some REALLY arbit posts. Dad n Mom, please do excuse me.... I'll gete right back to my books alright... Just that I havent written for ages... And when I start writing ( or for that matter, whenever I start doing ANYTHING), I dont do it in moderation :((
Do I need to organize my life? YES. But later.... Tomorrow will come, or so I believe today.

One of the most powerful phrases I have heard ( thanks to a fwd when I was @ MT) :
structured procrastination

I advice ANY one who is reading this to google and look up the same... Or hell, here's the URL.
http://www.structuredprocrastination.com/
U might
a) realize u have been one all the while, and just didnt know the formal name for it! (That's my story) :P
b) Avoid becoming one! ( 'Forewarned is forearmed' , aint it so? )

P.P.S. I've a fair amount of work to do this weekend ( its not yet reached the IF I DONT START NOW, I'M DEAD stage... which is why I'm still typing :p ) and hence I'm gonna write (hopefully, if I enthu to write doesnt suddenly disappear in another bout of str. proc. ) about some other stuff thats been happening / happened over the last....well, lets just say of late.
Ciao !